Story #3

Title: The Hamsters vs The Quarentiners

Cast List:
Hamsterwatch (Coach Hammy)
Christmas Abbott
Christie Murphy
Raven Walton
Vanessa Rousso
Christie Valdiserri

Vanessa Rousso was a long time gambling addict and has been in the casino for 3 days straight, across the lobby she spotted a woman playing roulette and doing surprisingly well. She decided she would go and introduce herself. “Hi, my name is Vanessa, I see you have celebrated the past 8 spins on the roulette wheel!”. The girl with bright red hair exclaimed in the most absurdly forced country accent,”HI, MY NAME IS RAVEN, IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU VANESSA, NO I JUST CELEBRATE EVERY TIME CAUSE MY MOM SAID IT WAS LUCKY, I AM DOWN 2 GRAND TONIGHT BUT IT'S OKAY!” Vanessa was taken back by the reaction, the two girls proceeded to chat and talk about both of their debts. Hours passed, as Vanessa had already gone broke over her 3 day gambling spree, she sat and watched Raven lose thousands. Raven, under the intimidation of being watched over while gambling, without knowing bet way too much than she anticipated. Across the roulette wheel, a bartender had been watching them for the entirety of their struggle. He approached them,”Hey ladies, my name is Hammy, I have many nicknames but only my mother can call me by my real name Hamsterwatch, but more importantly you girls can call my Coach Hammy, I am looking to find a team to take a shot at the women's ice hockey tournament this saturday, the prize for winning is 65 grand and anyone with a team can enter, do you girls know how to skate?” Before he could finish the sentence, both the girls knew they needed this money. Whether lying or telling the truth, they both abruptly exclaimed that they loved to skate. Vanessa finished off her vodka cran and Raven shoved down her tater tots, they took down Coach Hammy’s phone number and ran home, excited for their first practice tomorrow.

The next day at the teams first practice, Raven and Vanessa were shocked at how many teammates they had. They were immediately intimidated that they would not be good enough and would not win the prize. As they stepped on the ice they laughed as they slipped around, but were approached by a marvelous skater. The skater introduced herself, “Hey there, my name is Christmas.” As she helped Vanessa and Raven up onto the ice, Vanessa stated, “That's an interesting name, I'm Vanessa, how long have you been skating for?” Christmas replied, “My entire life, I've been the highest scoring player in this league, I'm like the Wayne Gretzy around here.” Raven in awe asked, “Do you think you could help us learn the ropes, I am only here for the money.” Christmas replied,”Let me guess, another casino case? Thats where Hamster finds most of his players, not many people are willing to play this sport, it's tough, there's more than 20 thousand hockey related injuries each year.” Raven exclaimed,”I AM A PAGEANT GIRL, CAN SOMEONE BUY ME A MOUTHGUARD I'M BROKE.” Christmas replied while laughing,”Well mouthguards are actually optional so I never wear mine, it's brand new and never used if you want it.” Raven nodded and Vanessa curiously asked,”How does Coach Hammy expect to win this with people who have no experience.” Christmas stated sarcastically,”How do we expect to win with a Coach named after a rodent either! Nothing makes sense in this league, for all we know, our biggest rival will be named Coach Chinchilla this season. You just gotta believe, come on, let's get to practice, the big game is in only a week!”

The girls all practiced for days on end, they got to know each other and teammates more and more over the next several days. The big game has finally come. The girls stepped on the ice after only a week of practice, full of nerves and energy. The players were not competing for the Stanley Cup, the trophy of the NHL championship, but a much needed 65 thousand dollars.

“Okay girls, the time has come, each one of you have been brought here for a specific reason, I believe in each and every one of you. I know for a fact you all have a reason to want to win this game. Do whatever it takes, and expect the unexpected.” Coach Hammy continued to motivate the team, but Vanessa was stuck in her thoughts. “VANESSA”, Coach Hammy exclaimed. “DO YOU OR DO YOU NOT WANT TO BE GOALIE.” Before Vanessa could get an answer out of her mouth from shock, a girl from the bench spoke up, “I'll play goalie!” yelled in a Staten Island accent. “No Christie, we will put Christmas as goalie for now.” The team was silenced as Coach Hammy walked away, the girls began to chat amongst themselves with only minutes till the game would begin. “He's in a mood” Vanessa stated to Christie. Christie replied “Yeah ya think, hi im Christie Murphy, Coach promised I'd get subbed on this game but i'll probably just sit on the bench like I do every game for every season, I could only dream of one day getting put on the ice.” Before Vanessa could reply the buzzer rang. “GO GO GO GET ON THIS ICE!” Coach Hammy yelled. Vanessa, Christmas, Raven, and the other girls skated into position.

The game was about to begin. As the puck hit the ice, the girls magically scored within the first minutes of the game. Vanessa led the team on defense through force… and the fact she kept crying at random points of the match in order to deceive the team into stopping their play. Raven on the other hand, thought she was playing incredible, this is because she would celebrate if either team scored, even the opponent. Christie stayed on the bench, hopeful that she would touch the ice eventually! Christmas stayed tough as goalie and played a key role in keeping the girls focused. As play continued, the girls extended their lead and won their first game. Putting them into the finals with a bye! They only now have one game left before they win the money.

After the game Vanessa and Raven sat down and discussed how they felt useless, although they won, they did not contribute and were worried about how the finals would play out. “We need this money, I got so much debt to pay off. From gambling and medical bills… I NEED THIS CASH! I just feel like we should be playing our girls on the bench more, I get so tired out there.” Vanessa replied, “I agree, Christie is very underrated. It's going to take a lot to win this prize, I heard the other team is incredible and also likes to play dirty.” Raven agreed and said,”YES, Coach Hammy told me how the other team will try to hurt and injure us. We just need to work as a team. I think we should get some sleep though, tomorrow is the big day!” Vanessa shrugged and headed home, she thought of all the possibilities she could do if she won that money.

The big day has arrived, the girls are at the skating rink and are extremely scared of the other team. “WHY ARE THEY SO BIG?” Raven yelled. “Shut the fuck up” Coach Hammy replied. The girls were nervous, but Christmas was not, she was extremely confident. She told her team, “Look girls, we did not think we would come out of the play offs as the favorites to win this but here we are. We can do this. Vanessa, keep up your little trick plays. Raven, keep.. Just keep doing whatever the fuck you do. We gotta fight for this.” Now motivated, the girls took position on the ice, Christmas in goal, all of the girls noticed how slick the ice was this game. The buzzer rang and the game began, the opponents, The Quarentiners, were athletic, strong, and very quick. As their team immediately were getting outplayed, Vanessa had to think on her toes. She got the puck and headed straight down the ice, only to be met by a huge goalkeeper. Vanessa failed to score and turned the puck over to the Quarentiners. With still a tie game, the opponents went straight for the goal, their forwards took Christmas from a blind spot, hitting her extremely hard when she least expected it. “WHAT THE HELL?” Raven yelled as she turned to Christmas, who was now gasping for air on the ground. “My… my leg!” Christmas murmured. Christmas had broken her leg. Vanessa in shock stated, “Wow, I knew they would play dirty, but not this dirty. We only have 1 minute left on the clock and no one has scored. Who is going to be our goalie?.” All of the players panned to the sideline at Coach Hammy. “Alright… Christie, now is your time.” Christie Murphy jumped up from the bench and yelled “YES! I've got this!” Coach Hammy replied, “No not you, the other Christie”. Everyone's eyes panned to a bald woman who had not said a word the entire week. “Who are you?” asked Vanessa. “I'm Christie? Christie Valdiserri? I'm the alternate goalkeeper for this team.” The team looked very confused and lost hope, losing their star goalkeeper for someone they had never met was devastating. “The show must go on” yelled Coach Hammy. The girls hit the ice with 1 minute left. It was The Quarentiners puck, they raced down the ice intending to hurt Christie the same way they hurt Christmas, but Christie had a different plan in mind. Christie WHIPPED off her helmet, and blinded her opponents with her shiny bald head! The opposing team were so distraught that Vanessa was able to gain possession of the puck! “SHOOT SHOOT” yelled Raven. From across the ice, Vanessa took a hail mary shot with mere seconds left. THE CROWD ERUPTED AS VANESSA SCORED THE WINNING GOAL! They had won the game! “WE WON? WE ACTUALLY WON?” yelled Coach Hammy. Coach Hammy then took the trophy but was faced with a decision. He had to distribute the prize money among the players. Only his 2 best players could get money. He took his time writing down his placements on how he thought his players did. “Do you think we're going to get paid?” said Raven. “We are the reason we won, we scored the last goal.” Coach Hammy posted the results and ran to his car. Raven was the first person to read the results and started celebrating with Vanessa “I GOT 2ND PLACE YES”. Vanessa immediately started to celebrate as Christie’s bald ass picked the paper up. Christie screamed in glory and ran out the stadium, Vanessa confused, picked up the placements and yelled “3RD PLACE?”.